(Linking up with Becky again this week)
First things first. I can't possibly be the only one who now has Cher's song stuck in my head, right? Right? All kidding aside, this post was an interesting one for me to write. I often think to myself, If I knew then what I know now...,
and think about how I would have approached or reacted in a situation
had I known what my future was going to be like. They say hindsight is
50/50, and it's true.
I wouldn't change a thing about my life, because I wouldn't be where I am today if I did. I don't regret the way things happened in my life because -- again --those things brought me to where I am today...and I'm so, so happy with my life. But I do wish that, in the moment, I had my future self whispering in my ear that things would be okay, that I would turn out just fine. So, if I could go back in time, here's what I'd do...
...I would tell my 10-year-old self that the bullies don't matter. I would tell her that if she can hold out until high school things will get infinitely better. Yes, she will be tormented every day, to the point where she truly doesn't know how much more she can take. But high school is a whole new world, and she'll make some of her best friendships there. Just hold on.
...I would tell my 15-year-old self to play it cool with the high school crush. I was ridiculously obsessed with a senior during my sophomore year, and I probably acted like a total fool because of it. Looking back, it's so embarrassing, but at the time it was all-consuming lust. I can only shake my head now, but good Lord...how mortifying. Tone it down, little lady.
...to stop for a minute and think about why an 18-year-old guy would be interested in her 15-year-old self. I'd also give my 15-year-old self a high five for not letting said 18-year-old force her into something she wasn't ready for. Yes, his anger was scary and the subsequent break-up hurt. But being dumped hurt a whole lot less than her self-esteem would have had she not stood her ground.
...I would tell my 17-year-old self -- oh, there are so many things I'd tell my 17-year-old self ...
...I would tell my 22-year-old self not to be so jealous of her younger sister. Just because she got engaged and married before it was even a possibility for you does not mean that it will never be your turn. Your time will come. Keep smiling and be happy for your sister because marriage is a wonderful thing and she found herself a good man.
...I would tell my 25-year-old self not to stress so much about her pregnancy. I was so thrilled but terrified at the same time, and there were times when I let the fear get to me and swallow up all the elation of being pregnant. I would tell myself that everything will work out wonderfully, and things will all fall into place.
...I would tell my 26-year-old self to focus on my marriage just as much as I focus on my new baby. Don't let motherhood make you forget that you're also a wife and you have a marriage that needs nurturing just like your baby does. Show your husband how much you love and appreciate him through your actions as well as your words.
...I would tell ALL of my "selves", at every stage of my life, to be thankful for my family. I wouldn't be the person I am today without my family, and I thank my lucky stars that these are the people God chose to surround me with. Break-ups, weddings, births, happiness, sadness and everything in between...my family was there. We celebrate the good things together and we're there for the bad, and I couldn't ask for a more wonderful group of people to spend this life with. I don't think I've ever told them all how much I love and appreciate them, but I hope they know that I do.
There are so, so many things I'd tell myself if I could turn back time. Looking back, I think the main theme of my life (so far) is that the best is yet to come. I wish that, in the moment, I had the foresight to stress less, to know that everything would be alright. I think I do that a lot now, though -- remind myself that everything will be alright. It's easy to let life consume you, to stop living it and to just be dragged along by it. If I could turn back time, I wouldn't do anything differently, but I sure would give myself the heads up that things are going exactly as they should be for me.
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC: If I Could Have One Super Power
I wouldn't change a thing about my life, because I wouldn't be where I am today if I did. I don't regret the way things happened in my life because -- again --those things brought me to where I am today...and I'm so, so happy with my life. But I do wish that, in the moment, I had my future self whispering in my ear that things would be okay, that I would turn out just fine. So, if I could go back in time, here's what I'd do...
...I would tell my 10-year-old self that the bullies don't matter. I would tell her that if she can hold out until high school things will get infinitely better. Yes, she will be tormented every day, to the point where she truly doesn't know how much more she can take. But high school is a whole new world, and she'll make some of her best friendships there. Just hold on.
...I would tell my 15-year-old self to play it cool with the high school crush. I was ridiculously obsessed with a senior during my sophomore year, and I probably acted like a total fool because of it. Looking back, it's so embarrassing, but at the time it was all-consuming lust. I can only shake my head now, but good Lord...how mortifying. Tone it down, little lady.
...to stop for a minute and think about why an 18-year-old guy would be interested in her 15-year-old self. I'd also give my 15-year-old self a high five for not letting said 18-year-old force her into something she wasn't ready for. Yes, his anger was scary and the subsequent break-up hurt. But being dumped hurt a whole lot less than her self-esteem would have had she not stood her ground.
...I would tell my 17-year-old self -- oh, there are so many things I'd tell my 17-year-old self ...
- ...to slow down and enjoy every second of her time with her first "real" boyfriend. My teenage years were a blur, but they were a happy blur. I'll always regret, though, that I didn't "stop and smell the roses" more often when it came to my first real relationship. I loved him and respected him, but when the relationship was over I realized that I hadn't truly lived it enough in the moment, and I mourned the hell out of that loss.
- ...not to choose a college based on where her boyfriend is located. Ultimately, I attended the college I was meant to. But I wish I had given myself more freedom to choose a school that wasn't so close instead of sticking around for a boyfriend who ended up breaking up with me the day of my high school graduation.
- ...that someone else will love you. I had my heart broken for the first and only time when I was 17 and, in typical teenage fashion, I spent days in tears thinking that the only person on the planet who could ever love me didn't want me. It took me years to come to terms with that break-up and to realize that someone else could and would and wanted to be with me (thank you, Scott).
- ...not to meet up with the ex who broke her heart. I don't even know what we were looking for here, but I do know that nothing good ever came of it. Every time we said goodbye it was like breaking up all over again. A clean break would have been much better for us all-around. Hindsight...
...I would tell my 22-year-old self not to be so jealous of her younger sister. Just because she got engaged and married before it was even a possibility for you does not mean that it will never be your turn. Your time will come. Keep smiling and be happy for your sister because marriage is a wonderful thing and she found herself a good man.
...I would tell my 25-year-old self not to stress so much about her pregnancy. I was so thrilled but terrified at the same time, and there were times when I let the fear get to me and swallow up all the elation of being pregnant. I would tell myself that everything will work out wonderfully, and things will all fall into place.
...I would tell my 26-year-old self to focus on my marriage just as much as I focus on my new baby. Don't let motherhood make you forget that you're also a wife and you have a marriage that needs nurturing just like your baby does. Show your husband how much you love and appreciate him through your actions as well as your words.
...I would tell ALL of my "selves", at every stage of my life, to be thankful for my family. I wouldn't be the person I am today without my family, and I thank my lucky stars that these are the people God chose to surround me with. Break-ups, weddings, births, happiness, sadness and everything in between...my family was there. We celebrate the good things together and we're there for the bad, and I couldn't ask for a more wonderful group of people to spend this life with. I don't think I've ever told them all how much I love and appreciate them, but I hope they know that I do.
There are so, so many things I'd tell myself if I could turn back time. Looking back, I think the main theme of my life (so far) is that the best is yet to come. I wish that, in the moment, I had the foresight to stress less, to know that everything would be alright. I think I do that a lot now, though -- remind myself that everything will be alright. It's easy to let life consume you, to stop living it and to just be dragged along by it. If I could turn back time, I wouldn't do anything differently, but I sure would give myself the heads up that things are going exactly as they should be for me.
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC: If I Could Have One Super Power
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