Stranger Danger

Every time I think I've come to "the hardest part" when it comes to parenting, life (and Bailey) throws something else at me that makes everything else seem like peanuts when compared.

I need to teach her about stranger danger.

Since she was teeny, Bailey has had a pretty outgoing personality.  She's not shy when it comes to sharing her feelings or playing with other kids, and it's just one of the many things that I love about her.  I don't want to stifle that part of her personality, but at the same time, I don't want her to feel quite so comfortable when it comes to talking to strangers, whether they be kids or adults.

I took her with me to Target the other day and made the mistake of letting her walk beside the cart instead of sitting inside of it.  Normally, she's pretty good about sticking close to me in a crowd, but she's been seriously testing her boundaries lately.  I turned my back for ONE SECOND to pick up a bottle of shampoo and she took off.  I started following her, but she knows at this point that I can't run because of my back, and she used that to her advantage.  I hustled along with my cart, trying not to make it obvious to other shoppers that I had a runner on my hands.  The closer I got to her, the faster she ran, until I almost lost her in a crowd at the end of an aisle.  I finally gave up, yelled her name, and told her to get back here now.  She knew I meant business then, and came back to the cart.  I didn't give her the option to walk anymore, and made her sit in the cart (crying, I might add) while I finished my shopping.  She was angry, I was angry, and we were both disappointed with how our shopping trip ended up (I promised to buy her nail polish while we were out, then made her put it back when she ran away).

Similar scene while at Rita's last night.  She kept inching away from me while I was ordering our water ice.  Telling her to come back was useless, and I ended up leaving my wallet sitting at the window and chasing her down before she ran into the parking lot.

I sat her down that night and tried to explain to her why she absolutely cannot run away from me when we're out in public.  I talked to her about strangers, and told her that if she runs away a stranger could take her and then I'd never see her again, and daddy and I would be so sad.  I don't know how much she got out of it, but she keeps mentioning "strangers" and "never see mommy again". 

I keep wondering if I went about this the wrong way.

Is there a "right" way to explain something like this to a toddler?  She's not even 3 yet, and I feel like there's SO MUCH that I need to shield her and protect her from.  How do I do that without making her afraid of everything?  I don't want her to lose her exuberance or her outgoing nature, and I don't want to make her a less-friendly person...but I also want her to know that not everyone is a friend and that there are some people in this world who can't be trusted.  How do I do that without taking away some of her wonder of the world around her?

Strange as it sounds, I feel like I'm taking away some of her innocence.  Does that make sense?  I feel like a little part of her childhood, the best part of her "kid-ness", has to die in order for her to learn this lesson.  And I hate that. 

So tell me, parents, how can I teach her about stranger danger without making her fearful of everything?